That Diagram on Wikipedia

I love how Wikipedia has become an unstoppable force. Every topic that anyone could possibly want to look up is going to find its way to Wikipedia - posted there by people who are deadly serious about the work they do.

Sigh. I can't blog about this here, because of the risque nature of the link. I know kids check out my blog, so I don't want to post a direct link here. But it'd be a crime against humanity not to share this with you. So here goes-

You know there's that Japanese term for a particular, um, act? It's a Japanese word - three syllables? Starts with the letters B-U-K?

Yeah, that.

Anyways, if you go to Wikipedia and do a search for that term, a page will load... with a tastefully done CARTOON DIAGRAM of the act.

Tasteful. And hysterical.

Some amateur fact-checker went to the effort of designing a tastefully done cartoon diagram to help explain what this is. You can just imagine there's some person who's never been exposed to the term, reads the wikipedia article, sees the diagram, then screams, "OH NO! WHY WOULD SOMEONE CHOOSE TO DO THAT?!?! I NEED TO BLEACH THIS AWFUL KNOWLEDGE FROM MY MIND!"

So what are you waiting for? Go now. Go to Wikipedia and do a search for it. Or email me and I'll send you the link.

And learn more than you ever wanted to learn. Thank God for Wikipedia.


EDIT TO ADD: As of August 2008, the hilarious image has been taken down.

I'm Lazy

While I have a spare moment, wanted to post something on the blog.

Oh - first off - the Onion is always funny. But sometimes, it reaches another level of genius - where it's both topical, side-splitting, and painfully true. This recent article is one of those times.

Now, onto the most depressing/inspiring thing I've read this week.

Most writers lament the fact that we don't have enough free time to work on original material. And being creative types, we make excuses - mostly about how we're too busy with paid writing work to work on our original pitches, spec screenplays, etc.

Then you read something like this from the NY Times-

Thumbs Race as Japan's Best Sellers Go Cellular

...A 21-year-old woman named Rin, wrote "If You" over a six-month stretch during her senior year in high school. While commuting to her part-time job or whenever she found a free moment, she tapped out passages on her cellphone...

...Her story of the tragic love between two childhood friends was turned into a 142-page hardcover book last year. It sold 400,000 copies and became the No. 5 best-selling novel of 2007...

She wrote her best-selling novel... WITH HER THUMBS. Suddenly all my excuses about not having time seem pretty pathetic.

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go write. Maybe on my @#$#-ing cell phone.

January 2008 Music Diary

I didn't do a Music Diary for December, because it was all the same Christmas music that I'd listened to the previous December. And the previous December. and the December before that.

So here's the newest Music Diary of what I'm listening to this month.

Homecoming - The Teenagers
Starlett Johansson - The Teenagers
Daylight - Kelly Rowland & Tracis McCoy
Long Road to Ruin - Foo Fighters
Flourescent Adolescent - Arctic Monkeys
Hot Stuff (Let's Dance) - Craig David
Over My Shoulder - I Am Kloot
Hard Sun - Eddie Vedder

The Teenagers is a strange band. Bad English accents, terribly amateurish (and crude) lyrics - yet their songs are crazy catchy.

Kelly Rowland's Daylight is a great single - it's getting the most play right now. Foo Fighters is close behind, along with Arctic Monkeys.

Hot Stuff isn't getting any play on U.S. radio, which is weird, since it's got such a fun David Bowie/80's sample-thing going on.

Steve Melching suggested I Am Kloot. So if you've got any suggestions, please send them my way.

I finally succumbed to all the "Into the Wild" commercials and got the Eddie Vedder track.

Venting

From the WGA today-

In order to make absolutely clear our commitment to bringing a speedy conclusion to negotiations, we have decided to withdraw our proposals on... animation.

Not surprising. Annoying, but not surprising. Even with a President who's been involved with animation writing for the past decade, the Guild still couldn't get anything done.

Not surprised. Just annoyed.

Don't expect any updates this week - busy with work. Stay dry everybody.

Best... Worst... Plagiarism... EVER

You may have heard of this controversy already, but this is awesome. This is beyond awesome. This is may be (wait for it) the GREATEST CASE OF COMEUPPANCE... EVER.

From Newsweek-

Move Over, ‘Meerkat Manor’
A nature writer suddenly finds himself at the heart of a hot plagiarism scandal.

When I traveled to South Dakota in 2005 to write a story about black-footed ferrets, I never imagined my words about the little weasels would one day appear in a trashy romance novel. I just wanted to write an informative and entertaining piece about these endangered prairie carnivores.

Three years later my story ("Toughing It Out in the Badlands") is at the center of 2008's sexiest plagiarism scandal.

Plagiarism scandal. And it gets better.

In the Internet age, every freelance writer fears that his or her words will be appropriated without compensation. First I was angry. Then I had to laugh. To see my textbook descriptions of ferrets in a bodice-ripper, as dialogue between a hunky American Indian and a lustful pioneer woman who several pages later have sex on a mossy riverbank, is the height of absurdity.

Yes. Apparently, a novelist plagiarized an article about FERRETS for her trashy romance novel. And not well-plagiarized, either.

"They are so named because of their dark legs," Shadow Bear says, to which Shiona responds: "They are so small, surely weighing only about two pounds and measuring two feet from tip to tail."

Shiona then tells Shadow Bear how she once read about ferrets in a book she took from the study of her father. "I discovered they are related to minks and otters. It is said their closest relations are European ferrets and Siberian polecats," she says. "Researchers theorize that polecats crossed the land bridge that once linked Siberia and Alaska, to establish the New World population."

Ohmygod that is so hot.

If you're like me, you just spit up laughing at the bad dialogue. Now, it's no David Mamet dialogue, but let's see Mamet try to work post-coital ferret-talk into one of his plays.

Because I SO WANT TO SEE DAVID MAMET WORK POST-COITAL FERRET TALK INTO HIS PLAYS.

Maybe Kevin Smith. He could do a good job with that, too.

I could pile on this train wreck, but it's just too easy. Plus Paul Tolme, the original author who was plagiarized, has already done a fantastic job of eviscerating the thief. Go read his entire article on Newsweek's site.

And to think when I started this blog, I never knew I'd someday be blogging about plagiarizing ferrets.

New Toys

Storm Hawks action figures
Originally uploaded by eugeneson

Got these at the local Target. And they're cool. Chicka-cha!

The Reality Show Next Door

Busy week this week. Nothing big - just lots of little things that quickly add up. Very little worth blogging about. It's also been kind of a strange week. For example, I had tickets to the Kings game Tuesday night that I ended up skipping because I was too busy.

Whew. Talk about a close call. Kings got thrashed 7-0.

I still PAID for those tickets to that game that I didn't use, but all things considered, I'm much happier that I didn't go. And that's not counting the extra money that would've gone to parking, concessions, and years of intense psychotherapy to undue all the damage.

And the strangest thing this week has been the reality show filming next door. My next door neighbors are on some E Reality Show where they go into the house, clean it, throw away all your junk, remodel the insides, and then film the whole thing.

Okay. Fine. My neighbors are normal folks. And if some television network wants to overwork a bunch of P.A.s to re-do their house for free, more power to them.

But the whole thing is weird. There're like six huge trucks parked on our street, there's an army of production assistants milling around, my wireless internet connection goes down intermittently because they have some weird wireless gear running, and for some reason, there're five wheelchairs blocking my driveway.

I assume the wheelchairs are used to move stuff around. Why they're using wheelchairs I don't know, but I hope there aren't any paraplegics somewhere having to move themselves about on dollies.

Anyways, I'm not a big reality show fan - still, I might watch the show when it airs. If for no other reason than to spy on my neighbors. But my house better not show up as some voice-over explains, "The houses in this neighborhood are all obviously dilapidated. LIKE THIS CRACK HOUSE HERE."

Okay - back to work.

EEeeeeeeeee

So I got a new toy, er, uh, new essential work tool that I need to work. Behold!



Ain't it adorable? I got myself a new EEE PC laptop - one of those super cheap sub-compact notebook computers. The thing is tiny - it's smaller than a hardcover book and only weighs two pounds. And when you have weak wobbly arms like I do, that's a big factor. Plus it's super cheap.

Of course, as the initial wave of giddy "I got a new toy"-ness fades, I'm faced with some issues with the new laptop. First off, the keyboard is tiny and takes some getting used to. I'm typing on it now and I'm making fewer typos on it the more I get used to it.

Then there's the OS. It comes with Linux, which I've read so much about. I've used it, but never really tried to USE IT use it, and I've figured out that there's a learning curve. A steep learning curve. Imagine me trying to run up the side of a sheer cliff wall. Yeah, like that.

I still can't figure out how to safely install a debian distribution from a xandros depository without pinning and whether I should be using the synaptic tool or the sudo command line options. I also have no idea what I just typed in the sentence above.

Maybe I should just plunk down the money and install Windows XP on this thing. It'll be slow and buggy and virus-laden, but at least I know how to use it.

Alas, this is what I have to put up with since it's not a Mac. There's a rumor now that Apple is releasing its own version of the teeny-weeny laptop. Oh well. With my luck it'll come out the very day I figure out how to install Snood on this thing...